"she has 16 hours of gymnastics practice every week, which markedly improves the report from school and now she's in love with it so I can't talk her out of it. I've tried. So spring break would be ideal."
This is going to sound harsh. So, essentially even though you have an available resource (FIRST) since your daughter would rather take gymnastics you are then going to push off this responsibility to a complete stranger and buy them lunch as a thank you? (Recognizing that that person of course will gain some karma by helping you out..) Why not just have your daughter learn a lesson early on about priorities in life?
Gymnastics, nice, leads to ?
Inspiration to be an engineer that gives a child career direction leads to...
Teaching your kids to stop playing sports in favor of pursuing their career is a terrible lesson. There is a lot more to life than your job - our culture fights that notion, but it's true.
Justice Byron White played college football, got a Rhodes Scholarship to Oxford, played in the NFL for Pittsburgh and Detroit, served in the Navy, built a private practice, and served on the Supreme Court for 31 years.
Gymnastics leads to becoming a well-rounded person, which is a pre-requisite for the Harvards and Stanfords of the world, which leads to exceptional careers in medicine or technology. American culture places a tremendous value on athletics, even for people in intellectual pursuits. In the business world, athletics is a key way for intelligent people to distinguish themselves within the pool of other intelligent people.
He also drank milk. I mean there is no way you are seriously suggesting logic like this are you?
"Gymnastics leads to becoming a well-rounded person"
I agree that Harvard and Stanford will choose only exceptional people (that is ones without other connections or advantages etc.) However even without doing any research, I somehow feel that there are quite a few people at all the IVY league schools who don't participate in sports at all. And never have. I went to one and I never did any sports. And I knew plenty of people that never did any sports. And I know that there is no checklist that says "reject if no sports" like there might be "reject if a felon".
For that matter what makes participating in any sport (gymnastics or otherwise) a pre for being well rounded? What about handicapped people?
Lastly it's obvious that there are many schools other than Harvard, Stanford or the usual suspects that allow people to lead exceptional careers.
So the question becomes to what extent are you going to play the game in high school with extra activities to try to get into a "top" school vs. a "really good school"
Not only that but some people actually can't handle academics and sport participation.
Somehow I feel that since it is well understood that grades and sat's are quite important (and there are clear demarcation points on those values) for some students it might actually pay to not do any sport or spend time learning to program.
Not being broke makes me pretty fucking happy. "Do what makes you happy and don't worry about money" is a platitude for the privileged and not actually life advice. "Do what you enjoy well enough to spend 40 hours a week on if someone is paying you for it" is a better goal.
well, probably healthier relationships with other people, for starters. blowing off your obligations to do whatever makes you happy is probably going to upset a lot of other folks.
there's certainly a balance to be had, and it isn't fully in favor of short term happiness, either.
And sitting in front of a computer for an extra 16 hours a week learning to program at the age of 12 instead of having normal social interactions is supposed to enable her to have "healthier relationships with other people"?
> blowing off your obligations
She is 12 years old. Are you people mad? She has very few obligations and that's a good thing. Let her have some fun before she needs to start being an adult.
> And sitting in front of a computer for an extra 16 hours a week learning to program at the age of 12 instead of having normal social interactions is supposed to enable her to have "healthier relationships with other people"?
huh, can't find the part where i suggested that. or anything like it.
in fact, pretty sure i said something about balance.
> She is 12 years old. Are you people mad?
i was addressing the values that kids should be taught, not the expectations for their behavior, and certainly not the expectations for one particular kid i don't even know.
perhaps look harder for alternative interpretations before resorting to madness as the most likely explanation next time?
"and it isn't fully in favor of short term happiness"
Exactly. And see nobody wants to believe that. They want to think that things will just work out.
I'm wondering about how many people downvoting or disagreeing are aware that the major problem in marriage (as reported in popular culture and I believe it from my observation to be true) are money problems. So sure hey continue to pursue what gives you happiness but don't forget the things that allow basic survival.
Both of my sisters received NCAA scholarships for gymnastics. So it can lead to a free education, where her daughter might choose to study something STEM.
Anecdotal still, but both of my sisters turned down the gymnastics scholarships. They trained 36 hours a week from age 6-18 and then quit completely. One is now a nurse and the other is in vet school. Seems wasting their childhood on something they loved wasn't terribly detrimental after all.
I think that there are "intangible" benefits to athletics (not just team sports) that you're missing here.
I swam in high school, out of everyone who was on my club team, which had pretty serious commitments, I think about 90% had some doors opened for them with college that wouldn't have been there otherwise.
It isn't always a full ride at a D1 school (only true for 2 out of about 30), but many got into schools they wouldn't have otherwise, others received partial D1 scholarships, and many others received large "leadership" scholarships at private D3 schools.
All this to say, there are some real benefits in the college process to competing at higher levels of high school athletics. Even if all the student gets is to spend a night on campus, and meet the entire team, and see the campus as a student, there's some real value to that.
In retrospect this is probably what seems to have made people upset (from the comments below)
"Gymnastics, nice, leads to ?"
That said I'm appreciative for the other perspectives.
I didn't mean to imply that there was no value in sports (although for sure that is what my sentence seems to say). What I meant is that I thought the value of the other program (FIRST) was more valuable in terms of setting the child apart. That's strictly my opinion it's obvious that others see it differently. You only have so much time in a week you can't do everything and have to triage based on what you feel the best outcome is.
I suspect it was downvoted for a lot of reasons. For example: What on earth is your problem with him asking this? So maybe you don't want to give time to a 12 yo girl. Does that mean others will not? There's just a lot of arrogance there. (and I could think of others, but I am honestly not trying to attack you, just give some feedback as to why this likely got downvoted)
But since you asked: I am female and did gymnastics as a kid. What has it led to? It has led to someone who knows how to fall without ending up in the ER. I have a serious medical condition which sometimes leaves me neurologically impaired. I sometimes fall down under circumstances where I really should be left bloody and with broken bones and the like. I am usually left with a few bruises and strains. That a) is worth big bucks in terms of money not spent on major medical care and b) priceless because god knows I have suffered enough from my medical condition, I don't need to be in the effin ER every time I turn around because I stupidly feel down. I have enough pain and physical limitations without it being constantly compounded by more scars and the like.
Gymnastics training is not just some frivolous indulgence.
This is going to sound harsh. So, essentially even though you have an available resource (FIRST) since your daughter would rather take gymnastics you are then going to push off this responsibility to a complete stranger and buy them lunch as a thank you? (Recognizing that that person of course will gain some karma by helping you out..) Why not just have your daughter learn a lesson early on about priorities in life?
Gymnastics, nice, leads to ? Inspiration to be an engineer that gives a child career direction leads to...